He might seem “cold” or “distant” at times. He might have low self-esteem or think he doesn’t deserve to be with you. He might even express that long-term relationships don’t work for him.

He might say he just can’t trust anyone. He may even claim something like, “Relationships are smothering. ” He’ll take a long time to warm up to you. He may also look for ways you’ll let him down. Some intimacy issues might also stem from harmful beliefs that men can’t be emotional. [5] X Expert Source Josh Spurlock, MA, LPC, CSTLicensed Professional Counselor Expert Interview. 13 January 2022.

He has less experience with talking about his emotions, so model how to do this. He shuts down or talks about different topics. Request to stay on the same subject. He’ll distrust anyone who asks too many sensitive questions. Start off slowly.

He might raise his voice a lot or have sudden meltdowns. Use a calm tone with him. He may pick fights with you or other people. Try some conflict management skills. He’ll probably be annoyed if you ask him to unpack his reaction. Just give him some space.

He may also analyze everything he says. Tell him it’s okay to make mistakes. He might work out at the gym for hours. Remind him you embrace more than just his body. He’ll tend to criticize others and say something like, “No one ever satisfies all my needs. ” Reassure him that it’ll just take time to get to know someone.

He might also go out all the time. Ask if you can spend a day with him. He may also rush any quality time you have with each other. Request that he slow down and talk to you. He might also give you one-word answers or just nod when you speak. You can match his communication style, but remain sensitive. For instance, you can say, “I understand. That makes total sense. ”

Ask about any stress in his life. He’ll like that he can be honest, even when life is challenging. [12] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U. S. National Institutes of Health Go to source Do a kind favor for him. You can help with chores or buy tickets to an event he’ll love. He’ll realize how much you care. [13] X Research source Share warm memories with him. When you’re nostalgic, he’ll cherish the relationship you two built. [14] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U. S. National Institutes of Health Go to source Talk about the relationship he wants. If he can voice his needs, he’ll feel your dynamic is sustainable. [15] X Expert Source Donna Novak, Psy. DLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 8 December 2020.

Work out with him. He’ll feel motivated and have a relationship routine to look forward to. [18] X Research source Cook a meal together. You’ll create teamwork in the kitchen and enjoy the creativity. [19] X Research source Bring him on a trip. You can plan the vacation together, then learn how you’ll explore new places as a couple. [20] X Research source Work toward both of your individual goals. He’ll see there’s plenty of room for independence in a relationship. [21] X Research source

Cuddle and kiss him. Your quick touches can relieve a lot of his stress. [23] X Research source Express gratitude. For example, you can say, “I love that you’re so witty and make me laugh. ”[24] X Research source Treat him to quality time. You can set aside a couple hours in the evening for each other. [25] X Research source Enjoy activities with him. For example, you can work or go to a trivia night. [26] X Research source Start deep conversations with him. [27] X Expert Source Donna Novak, Psy. DLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 8 December 2020. For instance, you can ask, “What’s the biggest risk you’d take in life?”[28] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good in Action An initiative by UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center promoting science-based practices for a meaningful life Go to source

Plan a romantic date for him. He’ll appreciate all the effort you put in for him. [30] X Research source Listen to emotional music and caress him. You’ll take the pressure off of him to have sex. [31] X Research source Share vulnerabilities with him. When you both talk about any fears or anxieties, you’ll be each other’s confidantes and can solve problems together. [32] X Research source